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  • Rewiring My Brain: From Binge Eating to Living More Fully

    Yesterday was a small but meaningful step forward. I stuck to my plan and got outside for a 30-minute walk around my local area . It was peaceful, refreshing, and surprisingly enjoyable. That alone felt like a win.

    Dinner wasn’t exactly the healthiest (Saturday night films and comfort food go hand in hand in my house), but we’re in the middle of a Pirates of the Caribbean marathon, and my little lad is obsessed with the sword fights.

    That said, there were moments I was proud of. I had fruit for lunch. I drank plenty of water. Most notably, I resisted the leftover party food at my son’s friend’s birthday, the adults were helping themselves, and I could’ve easily joined in out of habit or boredom, but I didn’t. That felt good.

    Today’s plans include a family Sunday lunch at my sister’s, there’ll be loads of vegetables… and probably pudding! I might try to balance it out with a longer walk and take my son out on his roller skates. Fresh air and movement help clear my head.

    Let’s Talk About Binge Eating

    I’ve been reflecting on something more serious: binge eating. It’s a topic that’s hard to admit out loud, but the NHS outlines some common signs that really hit home for me:

    • Eating when you’re not actually hungry
    • Eating very quickly
    • Eating alone or in secret
    • Feeling guilt, shame, or even disgust afterwards

    If I’m being completely honest, I relate to all of these.

    I don’t want to self-diagnose and say I have a binge eating disorder, but I also don’t want to ignore how much food dominates my thoughts. I’ve gained a lot of weight over the past few years. I often eat alone, partly due to co-parenting and being single. I eat fast. I eat out of boredom. And emotionally, I’ve been through a lot: a separation, a promotion at work, and a lingering feeling of not being “enough.”

    Food has always been something I’ve thought about, constantly planning the next meal, anticipating what I’ll eat, sometimes using it to fill time or emotion. It’s exhausting. I think it’s time I try to shift that mindset and rewire my brain.

    Rewiring the Brain: Where Do I Start?

    Thta might seem like a bit of a change of direction, but I think what will work for me is if I try to rewire my thoughts about food/eating.

    I recently came across an article on Healthline by Crystal Raypole titled How to Rewire Your Brain: 6 Neuroplasticity Exercises. It really got me thinking. Here are the six methods she suggests:

    1. Play video games
    2. Learn a new language
    3. Make music
    4. Travel
    5. Exercise
    6. Make art

    Amazingly, these aren’t out of reach for me. In fact, a lot of them feel… exciting.

    • Play video games: My little lad loves gaming and we often play together. He finds it hilarious that I’m terrible and he always wins, so this one’s easy.
    • Learn a new language: I’ve always fancied Spanish or Italian. I’m not committing just yet, but it’s definitely on the radar.
    • Make music: I’m Grade 8 in both piano and trumpet, and I have a piano in my living room. This is a no-brainer, I just need to make time for it again.
    • Travel: I’ve got a van that I’m slowly converting into a little adventure-mobile. There’ll be posts soon about upcoming trips, Ullswater camping is first on the list!
    • Exercise: I’ve started walking, but I also have a barbell tucked away at home. Why not bring that into the mix?
    • Make art: Crafting used to be a big part of my life, especially when my son was younger. I’d love to revive that creative side again, even just for fun.

    So, What’s the Plan?

    I’m going to experiment over the next few weeks. Instead of letting food and guilt take up space in my brain, I’m going to fill it with movement, creativity, and connection. I’m not expecting overnight change. But small daily choices , like a walk, a craft project, a music session, they all add up.

    And I want to keep documenting it here. It helps me process, and maybe it’ll help someone else too.

    Thanks for reading. If you’ve ever struggled with binge eating, emotional eating, or just feeling a bit lost in your relationship with food, you’re not alone. I’d love to hear what’s helped you, feel free to share in the comments or message me privately. Let’s keep the conversation going.

    Here’s to small steps and rewiring our brains, one choice at a time.

    Right now, I am going to go outside and play some football with my lovely little lad.

  • Elevated Body Mass, Elevated Motivation”

    So, here we are. The NHS website has officially confirmed what I kind of already knew but didn’t really want to admit: I’m obese.
    Not just chubby. Not curvy. Not carrying a bit of lockdown fluff.
    Obese.
    Or, as the letter I received from a medical professional so delicately put it—my “body mass is elevated.”
    Thanks for that, NHS. Such poetry.

    In truth, this “elevated body mass” is starting to elevate other things too—like my blood pressure, my stress, and my general grumpiness. I’ve been told by doctors that it’s having a profound and negative effect on my health and, honestly, they’re right.

    Yet still… I eat. And I eat. And I eat.

    But today feels different.

    I’ve stocked up on Protein Works shakes (which smell suspiciously like hope in a tub), and I’ve even bought actual fruit—not to sit in the bowl for a week and quietly rot, but to eat. I’m giving this three solid weeks of effort. Why three? Because in exactly 21 days, I’m going camping, and I’d really like to shift some of this “mass” before I’m wrestling myself into outdoor gear and pretending I enjoy sitting in a tent.

    Let’s be real—this plan is a bit extreme. One coffee. Fruit for lunch. A shake at 3pm. Another at 6pm.
    Is it sustainable? Probably not long-term.
    Is it healthy? Arguably not textbook.
    Is it necessary for me right now? Absolutely.

    Because the truth is, I’ve tried to lose weight for myself more times than I can count. And it never sticks.
    So this time, I’m doing it for someone else.

    I have a little boy who is my world. He’s funny, loving, energetic—and he deserves a mum who can keep up with him, chase him, play with him, dance with him, and feel proud.
    Not breathless, moody, and hiding under oversized hoodies.

    I don’t like the way I feel in my body right now. I don’t like how I’ve stopped caring about what I wear, how I avoid mirrors, or how sluggish I’ve become. My mood’s taken a hit, and my confidence has taken a holiday with no return ticket.

    So this time, the motivation isn’t me.
    It’s him.

    Because he deserves the best version of me.

    And losing weight? That’s where I’ll start.

    Here’s the plan:

    • Two Protein Works shakes a day (3pm and 6:30pm)
    • Fruit and veggies for snacks
    • one meal a day – which I aim to be a healthy one but sometimes life takes over and I can enjoy a meal with friends and family 🙂
    • Unlimited tea and coffee (because let’s be honest, I’m not giving that up)
    • 2 litres of water a day
    • Walk for 30 minutes daily
    • No eating after 6:30pm

    I thought about intermittent fasting, but I need my morning coffee and I like it with milk—so that’s staying. I’m aiming to stick to 1200 calories a day, which is a huge drop from my usual intake. I know I need to stay on top of nutrients, hydration, and energy levels, but I’m doing this with eyes open (and caffeine flowing).

    And now that I’ve written it all down here, on the internet, I kind of feel like I have to stick to it.
    Because telling the world (assuming everyone in the world reads this) makes it real.

    Let’s see what three weeks brings.
    Elevated body mass, I’m coming for you.

  • Hello all and welcome!

    So here it is—my blog. Nothing fancy, just a space for me to collect my thoughts, celebrate the wins (big and small), and be honest about the wobbles along the way. Think of it as a digital scrapbook of life, written mostly for me—but if you’ve stumbled across it, welcome!

    I’m a 40-year-old single mum to a gorgeous little boy. His dad and I co-parent pretty well… most of the time! Life’s not perfect, but it’s ours, and we’re figuring it out one day at a time.

    Big news: I’ve just accepted a new job. It comes with less stress, less responsibility, and yes, less money—but I’m betting on peace of mind and more time for what really matters. We’ll manage.

    This blog won’t follow one theme because, well, my brain doesn’t. One day it might be about cakes I’ve baked, another day it might be about teaching, creativity, or the latest DIY disaster (my bathroom still isn’t fully tiled—oops).

    Will anyone read this? Maybe. Maybe not. But that’s okay. I care about these moments, and if you’re here, I care about you too—even though my blog’s called But Who Cares, clearly… I do.

    Thank you

  • Rewiring My Brain: From Binge Eating to Living More Fully

    Yesterday was a small but meaningful step forward. I stuck to my plan and got outside for a 30-minute walk around my local area . It was peaceful, refreshing, and surprisingly enjoyable. That alone felt like a win.

    Dinner wasn’t exactly the healthiest (Saturday night films and comfort food go hand in hand in my house), but we’re in the middle of a Pirates of the Caribbean marathon, and my little lad is obsessed with the sword fights.

    That said, there were moments I was proud of. I had fruit for lunch. I drank plenty of water. Most notably, I resisted the leftover party food at my son’s friend’s birthday, the adults were helping themselves, and I could’ve easily joined in out of habit or boredom, but I didn’t. That felt good.

    Today’s plans include a family Sunday lunch at my sister’s, there’ll be loads of vegetables… and probably pudding! I might try to balance it out with a longer walk and take my son out on his roller skates. Fresh air and movement help clear my head.

    Let’s Talk About Binge Eating

    I’ve been reflecting on something more serious: binge eating. It’s a topic that’s hard to admit out loud, but the NHS outlines some common signs that really hit home for me:

    • Eating when you’re not actually hungry
    • Eating very quickly
    • Eating alone or in secret
    • Feeling guilt, shame, or even disgust afterwards

    If I’m being completely honest, I relate to all of these.

    I don’t want to self-diagnose and say I have a binge eating disorder, but I also don’t want to ignore how much food dominates my thoughts. I’ve gained a lot of weight over the past few years. I often eat alone, partly due to co-parenting and being single. I eat fast. I eat out of boredom. And emotionally, I’ve been through a lot: a separation, a promotion at work, and a lingering feeling of not being “enough.”

    Food has always been something I’ve thought about, constantly planning the next meal, anticipating what I’ll eat, sometimes using it to fill time or emotion. It’s exhausting. I think it’s time I try to shift that mindset and rewire my brain.

    Rewiring the Brain: Where Do I Start?

    Thta might seem like a bit of a change of direction, but I think what will work for me is if I try to rewire my thoughts about food/eating.

    I recently came across an article on Healthline by Crystal Raypole titled How to Rewire Your Brain: 6 Neuroplasticity Exercises. It really got me thinking. Here are the six methods she suggests:

    1. Play video games
    2. Learn a new language
    3. Make music
    4. Travel
    5. Exercise
    6. Make art

    Amazingly, these aren’t out of reach for me. In fact, a lot of them feel… exciting.

    • Play video games: My little lad loves gaming and we often play together. He finds it hilarious that I’m terrible and he always wins, so this one’s easy.
    • Learn a new language: I’ve always fancied Spanish or Italian. I’m not committing just yet, but it’s definitely on the radar.
    • Make music: I’m Grade 8 in both piano and trumpet, and I have a piano in my living room. This is a no-brainer, I just need to make time for it again.
    • Travel: I’ve got a van that I’m slowly converting into a little adventure-mobile. There’ll be posts soon about upcoming trips, Ullswater camping is first on the list!
    • Exercise: I’ve started walking, but I also have a barbell tucked away at home. Why not bring that into the mix?
    • Make art: Crafting used to be a big part of my life, especially when my son was younger. I’d love to revive that creative side again, even just for fun.

    So, What’s the Plan?

    I’m going to experiment over the next few weeks. Instead of letting food and guilt take up space in my brain, I’m going to fill it with movement, creativity, and connection. I’m not expecting overnight change. But small daily choices , like a walk, a craft project, a music session, they all add up.

    And I want to keep documenting it here. It helps me process, and maybe it’ll help someone else too.

    Thanks for reading. If you’ve ever struggled with binge eating, emotional eating, or just feeling a bit lost in your relationship with food, you’re not alone. I’d love to hear what’s helped you, feel free to share in the comments or message me privately. Let’s keep the conversation going.

    Here’s to small steps and rewiring our brains, one choice at a time.

    Right now, I am going to go outside and play some football with my lovely little lad.

  • Elevated Body Mass, Elevated Motivation”

    So, here we are. The NHS website has officially confirmed what I kind of already knew but didn’t really want to admit: I’m obese.
    Not just chubby. Not curvy. Not carrying a bit of lockdown fluff.
    Obese.
    Or, as the letter I received from a medical professional so delicately put it—my “body mass is elevated.”
    Thanks for that, NHS. Such poetry.

    In truth, this “elevated body mass” is starting to elevate other things too—like my blood pressure, my stress, and my general grumpiness. I’ve been told by doctors that it’s having a profound and negative effect on my health and, honestly, they’re right.

    Yet still… I eat. And I eat. And I eat.

    But today feels different.

    I’ve stocked up on Protein Works shakes (which smell suspiciously like hope in a tub), and I’ve even bought actual fruit—not to sit in the bowl for a week and quietly rot, but to eat. I’m giving this three solid weeks of effort. Why three? Because in exactly 21 days, I’m going camping, and I’d really like to shift some of this “mass” before I’m wrestling myself into outdoor gear and pretending I enjoy sitting in a tent.

    Let’s be real—this plan is a bit extreme. One coffee. Fruit for lunch. A shake at 3pm. Another at 6pm.
    Is it sustainable? Probably not long-term.
    Is it healthy? Arguably not textbook.
    Is it necessary for me right now? Absolutely.

    Because the truth is, I’ve tried to lose weight for myself more times than I can count. And it never sticks.
    So this time, I’m doing it for someone else.

    I have a little boy who is my world. He’s funny, loving, energetic—and he deserves a mum who can keep up with him, chase him, play with him, dance with him, and feel proud.
    Not breathless, moody, and hiding under oversized hoodies.

    I don’t like the way I feel in my body right now. I don’t like how I’ve stopped caring about what I wear, how I avoid mirrors, or how sluggish I’ve become. My mood’s taken a hit, and my confidence has taken a holiday with no return ticket.

    So this time, the motivation isn’t me.
    It’s him.

    Because he deserves the best version of me.

    And losing weight? That’s where I’ll start.

    Here’s the plan:

    • Two Protein Works shakes a day (3pm and 6:30pm)
    • Fruit and veggies for snacks
    • one meal a day – which I aim to be a healthy one but sometimes life takes over and I can enjoy a meal with friends and family 🙂
    • Unlimited tea and coffee (because let’s be honest, I’m not giving that up)
    • 2 litres of water a day
    • Walk for 30 minutes daily
    • No eating after 6:30pm

    I thought about intermittent fasting, but I need my morning coffee and I like it with milk—so that’s staying. I’m aiming to stick to 1200 calories a day, which is a huge drop from my usual intake. I know I need to stay on top of nutrients, hydration, and energy levels, but I’m doing this with eyes open (and caffeine flowing).

    And now that I’ve written it all down here, on the internet, I kind of feel like I have to stick to it.
    Because telling the world (assuming everyone in the world reads this) makes it real.

    Let’s see what three weeks brings.
    Elevated body mass, I’m coming for you.

  • Hello all and welcome!

    So here it is—my blog. Nothing fancy, just a space for me to collect my thoughts, celebrate the wins (big and small), and be honest about the wobbles along the way. Think of it as a digital scrapbook of life, written mostly for me—but if you’ve stumbled across it, welcome!

    I’m a 40-year-old single mum to a gorgeous little boy. His dad and I co-parent pretty well… most of the time! Life’s not perfect, but it’s ours, and we’re figuring it out one day at a time.

    Big news: I’ve just accepted a new job. It comes with less stress, less responsibility, and yes, less money—but I’m betting on peace of mind and more time for what really matters. We’ll manage.

    This blog won’t follow one theme because, well, my brain doesn’t. One day it might be about cakes I’ve baked, another day it might be about teaching, creativity, or the latest DIY disaster (my bathroom still isn’t fully tiled—oops).

    Will anyone read this? Maybe. Maybe not. But that’s okay. I care about these moments, and if you’re here, I care about you too—even though my blog’s called But Who Cares, clearly… I do.

    Thank you